There I was. Weary, despondent and wet. So, so wet.
I had been roped into escorting Curufinwë back to Aulë's Halls to complete an apprenticeship after a lovely summer at Formenos. We had been riding at a leisurely pace since the Mingling and had been under the bright, golden light of Laurelin. Until as the next Mingling drew near a ferocious storm arose ( compliments of Manwë). Luckily, Curvo and I had just reached the great road that ran from Valmar down to Tirion, and were not far from a small hamlet which boasted an inn of some renown.
Being sons of Fëanáro, we had planned on camping under Telperion's light the entire way, and had given no thought to unforeseen circumstances such as this. Therefore, we were without coin with which to pay for our lodging and the master of the house (a rather intimidating fellow) was not in the mood to give out rooms for free, third-in-line-to-the-throne-or-not. Faced with this dilemma I did what I had to do and began to entertain the crowd in hopes of getting enough to pay for a room whilst Curvo sat unhelpfully in a corner and proceeded to consume our rations.
I began to sing. I don't remember what I was singing or for how long I was there, standing before the faithful crowd. Some hours passed by and I'm not sure why it was that my gaze was caught by the small crowd of Vanyar who were gathered around the fire. Although I will praise whatever Power it was that guided my eyes in that moment. For as I looked upon the the group I found you, and I could see there was no one like you my dear. You were a maiden, fair and young, sitting among the high and mighty as a gracious queen. From under your golden hair you looked upon me with rapt attention and I knew that from that day forward we would be one soul.
Many a blissful year has passed us by since that night...
We have now recognized the failure of the Valar to protect their own and to heed our desperate cries as darkness and death descended upon us. We now in our new knowledge are as stallions before a great race, dancing with fury and chomping at the bit which holds us back, about to break loose creating a storm that I pray with little faith will not grow beyond our control.
We stand together now upon the summit of Túna, beneath the Mindon Eldaliéve, bathed in the red glow of the torch light. You look at me as though I were a stranger. As I come to think of it maybe that is correct, possessed by an impossible Oath as I now am.
Your snow white hands tremble in mine as I try to make you understand that I must go, I must make the Moringotto pay the price for what he has done. But know this Beloved Maiden, mine, wherever I go you'll be with me. In my thoughts and in my dreams.
I wonder if you'll still cry for me a thousand years hence. Or if you will simply carry on as though I were all but a phantom, in a dream of two lovers dancing in a land of silver and gold.
I can remember everything. Everything that I have done, the murder, the betrayal, the screams, the blood. It is all I have left to do as I welcome madness into myself like a long awaited friend. I form the conjurings of my mind into melodies which I will sadly sing into the relentless blowing wind.
I am all alone with no other beings in sight but the seagulls who cry against the crashing of the waves in symphony written before the moons rising.
There is no sign of you, come to tell me that all will be well again, to rest my head in your lap. I am glad. Glad that you are not here to see me and to see what I have become. Glad that you are not here to offer forgiveness, for there is none to be found for the likes of me.
I'm alone and a sadness that won't go away reigns in my heart at the knowledge that we will be forever torn apart. Yes, Beloved Maiden. I say forever because forever my sentence shall be. To walk alone and sing of my deeds to an ungrateful world which will soon forget lessons once learned. To scream out my grief to the pale emptiness of eternity. To have naught to remember you by but the banner of your love proudly standing in my heart until the worlds end.
To wonder if you still wait for me.
Title and inspiration are from "The Maiden And The Minstrel Knight" by Blind Guardian. Everything else is Tolkiens.
First time writing anything other than cracky headcanons on Tumblr. I Apologize in advance for any grammatical errors. I had my brother look at this but he just kept raising his eyebrows.
Chapter end notes:
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